after a long day, i came home to read the paper online. i opened it up, and was stunned to realize that the news of Lorraine's passing was not on the front page of the cbc. it took me a moment to realize that her passing is not the end of the world, in fact it's not a front page story at all...but it feels like it is. it feels like I need the world to stop for a moment. for it to be quiet while I try to wrap my head around things that are moving so fast and that everyone should be feeling the devestation I do.
lorraine was not a saint. she was not an angel. she was not perfect. she made me angry, hurt my feelings and she was a human being. but i loved her. i loved her for coming to our lives when we needed someone sane around. i loved her for making sunday night dinners, trying to make faspa, and for being the phenomenal baker that she was. i loved her for listening to me without judgement and opinion when i needed to talk about some hurts i was feeling in regard to my parents divorce. i loved her for taking most of the burden of caring and worrying about my dad away from me and my sisters. i love her most for helping me see my dad the way she saw him, and for loving him so much.
i'm going to miss her wink, her smile, and her sarcastic sense of humour. i'm going to miss just knowing she's at my dad's. i'm going to miss all of the everyday things that don't seem to significant until they are gone.
i loved lorraine, and i'm pretty sure that she loved me back.
;)
1 comment:
Sheryl, judging by the words said and the prominence of your family in the service yesterday, it was obvious how important you all were to Lorraine. She and your dad had a truly mutual and loving relationship. Their love and respect for each other was very touching.
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